Gilmore Girls Season 2 Quotes
Rory: People are different once you get to know them. If you'll remember, you weren't too fond of Luke when you first met him.
Lorelai: That's not true.
Rory: You called him Duke for two years just to make him mad.
Lorelai: And let me tell you, it worked.
Rory: But then you guys talked and eventually, time went by, and now you love him.
Luke: I'm having nightmares where I'm being chased by boxes with arms and they tackle me and throw clothes on top of me and secure it with masking tape and while I'm lying there, you're standing in the corner laughing putting gel in your hair!
Jess: Should I be putting a tongue depressor in your mouth right about now?
Luke: I just spent $100,000 and it's all YOUR fault! (Storms into the house)
Lorelai: Oh. Good. (Follows him)
Luke: I ran into Taylor at the market. I found out he owns the building that apartment was in.
Lorelai: No way!
Luke: (Pacing) That and several other properties all over town.
Lorelai: That is so weird.
Luke: He's systematically buying up the town. He's gonna turn it into Taylorville, where everyone will have to wear cardigans and have the same grass height!
Lorelai: You want to sit...?
Luke: And then he told me he's gonna told he's gonna buy the building next to the diner and turn into a collectible plates shop for freaks who don't have enough brain power to collect stamps! I lost it.
Lorelai: I can't picture that.
Luke: I walked around in a blind rage. I was crazy. I bought one of those Belgian waffles with the ice cream dipped in chocolate.
Lorelai: You ate that?
Luke: No, I didn't eat it!
Lorelai: Of course.
Luke: I'm upset. Not suicidal!
Lorelai: Right.
Luke: I knew I just had to do something and I just heard your voice going round and round in my head.
Lorelai: Yeah, it's kind of like the small world song.
Luke: Take a chance, Luke. Make a move, Luke. You can't have a single bed, Luke! So I bought the building!
Lorelai: You bought...
Luke: I went straight to the bank, signed a cashier's check, and I bought the building!
Lorelai: Wow.
Luke: I am the building's owner!
Lorelai: I heard.
Luke: I own the building!
Lorelai: Okay, don't worry. Maybe you can still get out of it. You can go back there and tell them you lost your mind.
Luke: Okay.
Lorelai: Or I bet you could sell it to Taylor!
Luke: Yeah.
Lorelai: So relax, you can still get out of this. Unless of course, you don't want to get out of this.
Luke: Oh, I want to get out of this. Why would I not want to get out of this?
Lorelai: Oh, owning that building gives you some options.
Luke: Like?
Lorelai: Like you could expand Luke's if you wanted to...
Luke: Yeah.
Lorelai: Or you could rent it to someone else...
Luke: Yeah.
Lorelai: Someone else who might drive Taylor crazy...
Luke: Maybe I should think about this.
Lorelai: Yeah, sleep on it.
Luke: Sleep on it. Right.
Mary: Now, I went over the square footage and the details of the lease with your husband this morning. Did he fill you in?
Luke: What? Oh no, we're
Lorelai: No, no, he didn't, but you know how men are. The minute that ball game comes on, all the realities of life just go right out the window.
Mary: Don't I know it.
Lorelai: I mean, I could answer the door wrapped in cellophane but unless I was wearing a Yankees cap. . .ugh, he wouldn't even notice.
Luke: Geez.
Lorelai: Oh, don't be embarrassed Snuffy, I'm just teasing. It'd be a Mets cap.
Rory: So, what guys do you have for the rain gutters?
Lorelai: Oh... a few other guys.
Rory: Like...
Lorelai: Like... Mo.
Rory: Ah, Mo.
Lorelai: And... Lou.
Rory: Good man, Lou.
Lorelai: And Moose, that is, if Doris'll let him out of the house after what happened at Chickie's bachelorette party-
Rory: Mom, I thought you were going to give Jess a chance
Lorelai: Rory, I just don't feel comfortable around him.
Rory: You didn't like Luke when you first met him.
Lorelai: Not true.
Rory: You called him Duke for two years just to make him mad!
Lorelai: This whole morning has been a little Twilight Zone-y.
Luke: Or Outer Limits-y.
Lorelai: What?
Luke: Great show. Just as eerie, same era but no one ever references it.
Lorelai: Oh, I'm sorry, I don't speak geek.
Luke: (shakes head, self-deprecatingly) Yep, stepped right in it.
Paris: According to the rules, we're not supposed to have dairy forty-eight hours before the debate. Did you eat any dairy today?
Rory: The milk in my cereal?
Paris: WHAT?!
Lorelai: Rory, your dad's on the phone.
Rory: Okay! (Takes phone)
Paris: (To Lorelai) Did you give her the milk?
Lorelai: Uh, I'd rather not say.
Lorelai: Hello, Paris. Were we expecting you?
Paris: You should have been!
(Sookie and Lorelai are discussing Sherry before they meet her)
Sookie: She's pretty.
Lorelai: Yeah she's got good hair.
Sookie: And look at her dress; she's been sitting for hours and not one wrinkle.
Lorelai: Must be a witch.
Sookie: And she's doing that no-hose thing.
Lorelai: Yeah she's a chic, good-haired, wrinkle-free, no-hose-wearing witch.
Rory:(about Sherry) She's a very safe driver. Stops at yellow lights, uses her turn signals...
Lorelai: So she will not be driving our getaway car.
Rory: What are we robbing?
Lorelai: A Sephora. We talked about this.
Rory: Right. Sorry.
Rory: Think fast!
(Rory tosses phone to Luke who catches it in mid-stride with no trouble)
Lorelai: (to Rory) Whoa, impressive! Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Rory: What?
Lorelai: Goalie for the bagel-hockey team.
Rory: And bump Schmitty?
Lorelai: Schmitty's over the hill, he's washed up, put him in Cooperstown. (to Luke) Suit up, kid!
Luke: Call me if anyone sane walks in.
Luke: You okay?
Lorelai: Yeah.
Luke: You don't seem your chipper self.
Lorelai: I brought some sparklers. I'll light them later and do some kicks.
Luke: You know, if you want I can clear the counter and you can play some bagel hockey.
Lorelai: You can't play bagel hockey by yourself.
Luke: I'll play with you. You'll have to explain the rules.
Lorelai: It's okay. I'm just trying to recover from last night. It was one of those nights where you start off stepping in quicksand and end up with a sixteen-ton anvil landing on your head.
Luke: I've had plenty of those. I'll bring some coffee.
