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A person that has to pump her naughties full of gravy to feel good about herself clearly doesn't have the self-esteem to be my head cheerleader.


I don't need the sound of your stretch marks rubbing together.


Everyone told me that Sue was the school bully and you were really nice. Guess they got that half right.


Mercedes: Is that a men's sweater?
Kurt: Fashion has no gender.

Puck: Dude, your mouth is huge. How many tennis balls can you fit in there?
Sam: I don't know. I've never had balls in my mouth. Have you?

Tina: You ignored me for weeks this summer.
Artie:I was playing a marathon game of Halo, woman.

They fell in love over the summer, at Asian camp.


We need chorus glee club members, people to stand behind me with wet eyes while I sing solos.


Female football coach, like a male nurse? Sin against nature.

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