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Somewhere in that pea brain of yours is a man. Access him and tell him to prove to me that I chose the right guy to have a baby with.


Mr. Schue, kids are busier than when you went here. We've got homework, and football, teen pregnancy... lunch.


If I have a pregnant girl doing a handspring into a double layout, the judges aren't going to be admiring her impeccable form, they're going to be wondering if the centrifugal force is going to make the baby's head start crowning.


I love you more than I love being a star.


$1,200. That's enough for the short bus and two cases of Natty Light for the ride home.


I'm all about being a team player. But my family comes first.


You think this was hard? Try auditioning for Baywatch and being told they're going in another direction. That was hard.


Rachel: People just don't like me.
Finn: You might wanna work on that.

Artie: I wanna be very clear: I still have the use of my penis.

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