Sundays 10:00 PM on Showtime
House-of-lies

I know what I'm doing at work, but at home with him I don't have a fucking clue.

Marty

If I thought it would grease the wheels, I would run a train on Eyebrows and Ink Stain.

Clyde

The deterrent aspect of mutually assured destruction is predicated on the assumption that both parties are rational. Now you not being a good person by any stretch are at least a rational individual. I on the other hand, I'm a goddamn terrorist and I will crash my 767 right into your prodigious fucking forehead.

Marty

You know what? Maybe I should suck your dick, I've already got your balls in my hand.

Marty

Making a great mix CD requires a level of guile and and and whim you could not possibly understand.

Doug

A Stella McCartney scoop neck sweater and a nice pair of wide leg slacks. You know what would make it all really fierce? Crocs! I'm just gonna come right out and say it, the movie version of Rent, way better. Nicki Minaj strangles puppies.

Marty
Displaying all 6 quotes