Give my regards to the sweat lodge and / or asylum.

Mary

I was on the right path all along. I just didn't know it.

Carlos

Family is never perfect. All it is really, is yours.

Mary

Little girl: He's not feeling too good. Pooped all over our energy garden.
Mary: Well, you've got an energy garden. You kind of had it coming.

Since taking an early retirement from the hubcap business, Carlos has gone a little hippie granola. In addition to his alpacanomics, he fancies himself a bit of a shaman.

Marshall

Stan: She buy it?
Marshall: I think so. She just hung up without a sarcastic comment.

"For two days I sweated through sweat pants which is harder than it sounds."

Marshall

A child is going to be who a child is going to be.

Mary

The sign of a healthy compromise. Everybody's pissed.

Stan

It's one baby. I'm not having puppies.

Mary

I have no idea on what it takes to make a good parent but I've got a pretty good handle on what it takes to make a bad one.

Mary

Single mothers are super heroes but I don't want to be one.

Mary

In Plain Sight Quotes

One of the most difficult moments in anyone's life is when the fog of childhood lifts and we see for the first time our parents as people.

Mary

Marshall: You are in a different kind of mood this morning.
Mary: Actually, I'm in a really good mood. Which is kind of weird considering where I was 48 hours ago. Then I had a witness off herself and, like that is not bad enough, I've got to play second fiddle to a knucklehead like you.
Marshall: Thanks for lumping me in with kidnapping, attempted rape and suicide. Can't tell you how much that means.