Me and Jionni, we're going to have guido babies. I know it. I can't wait to pop those suckers out. They're going to be so tan, and cute. Oh, I'm so excited! I hope I have a C-section because I don't want it to f-ck up my vagina.


Mike's new thing is karate. I'm like yeah, alright Mike. Do your thing, Kung Fu Panda.


I just need to get it in. I just need to touch his freakin' tan wiener...I shouldn't have said that. But, his wiener is tan and I love it.


Vinnie: Doorbell!
Snooki: Shut up. No, you're lying!
Pauly D: You're so bad, bro. Snooki if he really was here that was poor response time. You should never keep a man waiting.

I would say that club Space had so much better ratio between hot dog buns and hot dogs that I am determined to get it in tonight.

Mike "The Situation"

We sat in the waiting room for two hours or so, at least. And, molto molto paperwork, and uh...once that was terminale we got Team Meatball and got out of there.

Mike "The Situation"
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