Louie

Mondays 10:30 PM on FX
Louie
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Are you taking water with it? (Yes) And food? (Yes, I've been taking it with my meals) And have you been urinating regularly? (Ugh. Yes, I have) How many times did you urinate today? (Well, I, uh, 3 times? I urinated 3 times today.) Did you have a bowel movement today? (Yes I did! I had a bowel movement!) What was it like? Was it soft?... was it hard? Or was your bowel movement normal? (Well, it was probably soft, but mostly normal) You should be fine.

Pharmacist

Hi, so listen either you gave me the crabs or I gave you the crabs but anyway I have the crabs and you were inside me last week so you got the crabs, too... Uh, so, fuck you! Or sorry. I don't know which one.

Maria

I owe you a blow job... So, notify me when you want me to - suck it.

Dolores

It's a rug! It's fine! That's the level of passion a rug warrants. It's a rug. It doesn't solve all my problems. But it doesn't make me angry. It's a rug. It doesn't smell bad. It's flat. It's blue. It goes on the floor. It's not coated with AIDS. And it's not a portal to a nether place. It doesn't make me cum, but it's fine.

Louie

If you go with me, I promise to give you a blowjob...I'm not asking for charity from you. I don't need your help. I'm just saying if you offer it, I'll suck your... dick.

Dolores
Displaying all 5 quotes

Louie Season 3 Episode 7 Quotes

It's a rug! It's fine! That's the level of passion a rug warrants. It's a rug. It doesn't solve all my problems. But it doesn't make me angry. It's a rug. It doesn't smell bad. It's flat. It's blue. It goes on the floor. It's not coated with AIDS. And it's not a portal to a nether place. It doesn't make me cum, but it's fine.

Louie

If you go with me, I promise to give you a blowjob...I'm not asking for charity from you. I don't need your help. I'm just saying if you offer it, I'll suck your... dick.

Dolores