Modern Family

Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern family

I have to get old... you don't have to get fat.


Can we stop calling me little guy? I'm in the fortieth percentile.


You have a laugh that makes science lab seem like recess.


I've seen the kid do a pull-up.


The universe is cold and loveless.


Mitchell: I had to settle.
Cameron: Well, your mom might think so, but some think I'm a catch.

Does he have a mallet? Then how does he get hit in the head?


Did he trump me? You tell me. He made a painting out of a photograph one time. I have hand picked a card, drawn a heart in the steam on the medicine cabinet, and taken Claire to Fritelli's, a family style Italian restaurant, for 17 years in a row...yeah, he got me. He got me.


All women should look as tasty as you when they're old.


Phil: My wife is always so tired and she's always making lists of things for me to do.
Claire: Maybe if you did them she wouldn't be so tired.
Phil: Oh no, she could make lists for days.

Phil: I'm in town for a trade show. I design high-end electro-acoustic transducers.
Claire: Wow, that is very specific.

Jay, you look so strong and sexy. Like an Olympic wrestler, but with money

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 15 in total

Modern Family Season 1 Episode 15 Quotes

He has a natural confidence. I admire it and fear it.


Perhaps I'll be Reginald Appleby. An English gentleman in town for a polo match.

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