Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCModern Family Quotes
Wait, does that mean you also didn't like my bagpiping? Is that why we have Luke?
Phil
Luke: What are you constantly looking at on your computer?
Alex: Is that a question you really want people asking around here?
She may not have gotten our talent, but she didn't get our self-consciousness either.
Cam
Manny: Hey, that's my bike!
Luke: We're all making sacrifices. I'm wearing a monokini.
If you can't beat em, drone em!
Phil
Manny: And just like that, it disappears.
Luke: In his defense, the water is really cold.
The minute they got rid of rotary phones, everything went to hell.
Jay
Wait, I just thought of something! I’m going to be the first woman in my family not to get pregnant and drop out of college.
Alex
Let's review. She's been moody, eating weird food, getting nauseous. She left in the middle of the night for a wedding chapel in Vegas with her secret love, and most suspicious of all, she bought a book!
Claire
Haley got married? She is in so much trouble!
Luke
How'd you get in my phone? Does this mean that when we talked the other day, you knew I was in the can?
Jay
Claire: I asked you to clean up the kitchen nine hours ago when I left for work. I come back and it's the exact same mess PLUS pickles and peanut butter.
Haley: I was running around doing stuff for my crazy boss all day, and then I got hungry, and then the smell from the garbage almost made me throw up!
