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Ncis

Ziva: Being stuck at that desk has given me a lot of time to think. Being a visitor here is wrong.
Gibbs: What does that mean, Ziva?
Ziva: I need your signature on this. I want to be an NCIS agent.
Gibbs: I don't even know if that's possible. You would have to resign from Mossad.
Ziva: Already have. Sent my father an email.
Gibbs: Hmm. Now what's he think about that?
Ziva: It does not matter.

Abby: I only take orders from one person: Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs. Unless he asks me to do it, it doesn't get done!

Ziva: That is total salami!
Tony: Bologna.

Tony: You failed your polygraph! That's not good.
McGee: No, I didn't fail it. They said I have to take it again.
Tony: Why would you have to take it again? Don't ask, don't tell. You didn't make the mistake of coming out, did you?
McGee: I don't have anything to come out about.
Tony: Stick to that story, McQueen.

McGee: I can take care of the video surveillance, it's the K-9 patrol I'm worried about.
Tony: Chillax, bro. All these budget cuts and economic problems, they can't afford dogs. Trust me.

[to McGee] That's like a yoga position. Upside down manatee.

Tony

Ziva: Burns pushed for the Arnett case to remain open by saying WE made a mistake. He knew we would eventually be forced to exhume Arnett's body to prove his death was accidental.
McGee: And when it was found missing his blog would explode.

Tony: [points to casket] Hop in.
McGee: Why would I do that?
Tony: We take a picture, pretend that you're dead, and you don't have to retake the polygraph!
McGee: Tony that is not funny.
Tony: They already think you're ducking them. It's only going to get worse.

McGee: You know how many connections I've found between Arnett and Sutton? Zero. I have checked everything. Emails, phone records ... is that pastrami?
Tony: [nodding, eating] Mmm.
McGee: Can I have a bite?
Tony: [shakes head] Mmm.

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