I love animals, but I think I'd love my husband more.Abby
Abby: Gibbs, I can't have a conversation by myself!
Gibbs: It's never stopped you before.
McGee: How do you sleep at night?!
Torres: On my back. Naked.
Detective Campbell: I invited NCIS here as a courtesy.
Gibbs: How about as a courtesy, I don't kick your ass!
Bishop: Technology tantrum.
Torres: Joining my club, McGee?
You're why others are alive. No phone call killed your friend.Gibbs
Suspect [McGee is playing Bad Cop]: Get him off me!
Torres: I would, but he's scaring *me*!
I don't kick down doors. Are you saying I'm not a crime fighter?Abby
McGee: Office equipment is your friend.
Torres: It's a bad friend, the one you lend money to and never pays you back!
Well, we don't have a firm date yet, but we plan on saving money on the invitations just by telling Bishop, and everyone will show!McGee [on his wedding]
Gibbs: That's a long swim for an innocent man!
Wayne: I'm not innocent! ...of the imposter stuff...
He's off his meds.Quinn [regarding Gibbs's intensity]