When God gives you a swastika, he opens a window. And then you remember, there is no God.

Red

Janae: Black people can't be racist. We have no power.
Black Cindy: I'm gonna have to call bullsh*t on that. I'm sorry, look, we may not be able to act on our racism, like, put people in a ghetto, send them to sh*tty schools...-kill 'em in the back of police vans. But we sure as sh*t can be racist as everybody else, because this is America. Land of the free, home of the racist.

Gina: Jesus, Chapman. A little magic happens around here and you make it all about you, like you made it happen.
Piper: But I did, that's my point. I'm gangsta. Like with an "A" at the end.

Lolly: Well, guess who's back on the ground?
Alex: Uh-uh.
Lolly: Come on! [snaps fingers] Shirt up, bra down, floobies out, face slack. Dead girl porn. Cosby dream shot.

Freida: Haven't you ever killed someone before?
Alex: No. Have you?
Freida: That's personal. But if I had, I'd know better than to waste my time digging one six-foot hole when I could dig six one-foot holes.That's just murder math.

Piper: You know what? I really love your beard.
Piscatella: I've had a beard since tenth grade. Two beards, actually. The one on my face, and the one I took to junior prom. Yeah. I like dudes. I will never find you adorable. Keep that in mind.

No, in your heart of hearts, you know as well as I do, red velvet is bullsh*t. It tastes like Play-Doh. It is not velvety. And the only thing that's good about it is the cream cheese frosting, which is mean to live on top of carrot cake, like God intended.

O'Neill

I was there for Alex. She was what I paid attention to. Who I paid attention to. Everything else was just background

Piper

Red: Useful how?
Piscatella: Anything would be appreciated.
Red: Aspirin reduces your risk of heart attack...but can be toxic in large amounts.

I just didn't expect to be punished... while I was being punished.

Piper

Sam: Why?
Piper: Why isn't this the Radisson?
Sam: Why do you need to be moved? Did somebody try to engage with you?

Piper: One of my roommates has a massive heart attack when she got here.
Larry: OK - you are not allowed to have a heart attack.

Orange is the New Black Quotes

When God gives you a swastika, he opens a window. And then you remember, there is no God.

Red

Janae: Black people can't be racist. We have no power.
Black Cindy: I'm gonna have to call bullsh*t on that. I'm sorry, look, we may not be able to act on our racism, like, put people in a ghetto, send them to sh*tty schools...-kill 'em in the back of police vans. But we sure as sh*t can be racist as everybody else, because this is America. Land of the free, home of the racist.