Lois: Okay, Clark. Let's talk about something else--like your online-dating profile.
Clark: But that was supposed to be private.
Lois: Well, I'll give you this. You definitely were honest. But admitting that you grew up on a farm is either going to get you a date with a country mouse, or a cougar looking for her next meal.

Lois: Ollie, I need your help.
Oliver: It's not a good time, Lois.
Lois: You know how Clark and I have this side job hosting Good Morning Metropolis?
Oliver: Uh, Clark Kent's hosting morning television? I can't wait to watch him show me how to bake a cake.

Clark's on a blind date? Talk about footage of a train wreck.


Tess: Fix the situation, Stuart. Or I'll have you terminated.
Stuart: Okay, By terminated, though, you mean fired, right? Right?

Clark: Look, there are a lot of good things about you that would attract a lot of great guys.
Lois: Really? Like what?
Clark: Uh... well, you're Lois.
Lois: Thanks, Clark. But I already filled out my name.

Clark: Well, let's see what you wrote. All right. Under "likes," you have the theater. You mean movie theater.
Lois: Details.
Clark: Favorite drink - you have "bubbly." Yeah, if it comes in a six-pack.
Lois: Well, I do like a six-pack.

Lois: If you want these mainframe matchmakers to pick you a winner, you really have to be careful to choose exactly the right words.
Clark: I filled mine out in 10 minutes this morning.
Lois: I guarantee that's the only 10 you're going to get out of it.

Wow. Tackling morning television to get into Lois' good graces. You know, this has got to be one of your bravest moves yet.


Lois: Do you even care if I get this job?
Clark: Of course I care. I bought a new tie.
Lois: Oh, well I bought a whole new outfit.
Clark: Yeah, you look great.
Lois: Don't do that.
Clark: Do what?
Lois: Don't you dare reassure me right now.

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