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Raj: She gives me things, too.
Raj's father: Yeah, yeah, I'm a gynecologist. I know exactly what she gives you.

Sheldon: The Koothrappalis aren't just rich, they're Richie Rich rich.
Penny: How much is that?
Sheldon: About halfway between Bruce Wayne and Scrooge McDuck.

Raj: Whatever, dude. She kissed me.
Howard: It might've been on your lips but it was my kiss.
Raj: Oh, fine, let's agree she kissed both of us.
Howard: Okay.

Tell her her eyes shimmer like opalescent lilies in the lake of the palace of the celestial maidens.


Raj: Okay, I'm going to play it cool. Tell her, "Maybe. Whatever, babe."
Howard [translating in sign language to Emily]: He'll text you.

Okay, so future grief-stricken widow is the one to beat.


Raj: I don't know if I want to play anymore.
Sheldon: Because you don't have a girlfriend? Well, good lord, if that becomes a reason not to play Dungeons & Dragons, this game's in serious trouble.

Leonard: We enter the dungeon.
Sheldon: You see a dragon.

Leonard: See, this is the good thing about having a girlfriend 9,000 miles away I can spend my nights doing whatever I want.
Howard: You mean playing nerd games with us and then taking a suspiciously long shower?
Leonard: Maybe.

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