Raj [referring to making Penny Blossoms]: You know if I wanted to do this on a Saturday night, I would have stayed in India
Wolowitz: Drop the third world country act. Your father was a gynecologist and you had a houseful of servants
Raj: We only had four servants and two of them were children

Penny: It looks like the MySpace page of a 13 year old girl
Leonard: No it doesn't
Wolowitz: Oh please, Dateline could use it to attract predators

Sheldon: You'll effectively be paying yor self 5.19 per day
Penny: A day??
Sheldon: There are children in sneaker factories in Indonesia that outearn you

Sheldon: I'm a physicist. I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains
Penny: Who's Radiohead?
Sheldon [after twitching for a minute]: I have a working knowledge of the important things

Howard: you know what would bea great idea? We get some girls over here and we play laser obstacle strip chess
Leonard: Believe me howard, any girl who would want to play that, you don't want to see naked
Howard: You underestimate me

Sheldon: You won the Nobel prize, what, three years ago? So you must deal with a whole lot of "what has Smoot done lately?" My thought is we continue my research as team, you know, Cooper-Smoot, alphabetical.. When we win the Nobel Prize, you'll be back on top
Dr. Smoot: With all due respect, Dr Cooper, are you on crack?
Sheldon: Fine, Smoot-Cooper, what a diva

Hi, I'm the small package good things come in

Wolowitz [to Sumemr Glau]

Normally, around women he has the personality of a boiled potato. Put one beer in him, and he has the personality of M. Knight Charmalarmalon

Wolowitz [about Raj]

Leonard: Well, it seems once again you're caught between a rock and a crazy place.
Sheldon: Oh, I hate when that happens.

Wolowitz: Unlike you, I can actually talk to women while I'm sober.
Raj: You fail to take into account that even mute, I am foreign and exotic, while you on the other hand, are frail and pasty.
Wolowitz: Well ... you know the old saying: "Pasty and frail, never fail"

I have eleven hours with her in a confined space. Unless she's willing to jump off a moving train and tuck and roll down the side of a hill, she will eventually succumb to the acquired taste that is Howard Wolowitz

Wolowitz [about Summer Glau]

Wolowitz: Ma, you gotta rent me a tux!
Mrs. Wolowitz: Right now? What kind of sex are you having up there?

TBBT Quotes

Amy, I excel at many things, but getting over you wasn't one of them.


(Singing) Thor and Dr Jones, Thor and Dr. Jones. One plays with lightening, the other plays with bones.

Howard and Raj