The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSThe Big Bang Theory Quotes
Leonard: Hey, how's it going?
Wolowitz: Cut the crap, you set this up, didn't you?
Leonard: Yes..
Wolowitz: She's a hooker, isn't she?
Raj: A prostitute, yes
Wolowitz: You already gave her the money?
Leonard: Yes
Wolowitz: ... Thank you
Raj: We should have a plan in case one of us gets lucky
Leonard: Umm... okay...if I get lucky, I'll take her to my stately manner outside Gotham City. If you get lucky, I'll sleep on the moon
Leonard: Sounds like a plan
Leonard: What were you doing at Penny's?
Sheldon: Well, we had dinner, played some games, and then I spent the night. Oh, and you'll be happy to know that I now have a much better understanding of "friends with benefits"
Raj [about Wolowitz]: Too bad he wasn't here for that hooker. She was exactly his type: a hooker
Raj: I'm telling you Leonard: Video slots, free drinks brought to you by a bosomy barmaid, and all-you-can-eat shrimp for $3.99. Disneyland can suck it. This is the real "happiest place on Earth"
You know, I'm given to understand that there's an entire city in Nevada devoted specifically to help people like Howard forget their problems. They replace them with new problems such as alcoholism, gambling addiction and sexually transmitted diseases
Sheldon
What exactly does that expression mean, "friends with benefits?" Does he provide her with health insurance?
Sheldon [about Wolowitz and Leslie]
I'm a horny engineer, Leonard. I never joke about math or sex
Wolowitz
In bars, all across this great nation of ours, Thursday night is Ladies Night. Which means that as the evening progresses, we will get better looking courtesy of 99 cent margaritas and 2-for-1 Jello shots
Wolowitz
You're probably thinking, "the comic book store, on a Thursday? Why I've fallen down the rabbit hole and into a land of madness." What you have failed to take into account, Penny, is that this is "Anything Can Happen Thursday"
Sheldon
Sheldon: More wrong? Wrong is an absolute state and not subject to degradation
Stuart: It's a little wrong to say to say a tomato is a vegetable, it's very wrong to say it's a suspension bridge
Wolowitz: First we let the lawyers and the jock thin the heard, then we go after the weak, the old and the lame
Leonard: That's your system?
Wolowitz: Yeah and if you spot a girl with a seeing eye dog, she's mine
