I miss the days when there was only one party I didn't want to go to.

Ryan

Karen: Uh, so I had a couple of ideas to make the Stamford people feel more at home. Each year we have a Christmas raffle...
Angela: It would never work here.
Karen: Okay...um, another idea was karaoke...
Angela: No.
Karen: A Christmas drinking game...
Meredith: YES.
Angela: God help you!

Michael: I'd like everybody's attention. Christmas is cancelled.
Stanley: You can't cancel a holiday.
Michael: Keep it up Stanley and you'll lose New Year's.
Stanley: What's that mean?
Michael: Jim, take New Year's away from Stanley.

It's a bold move to Photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski trip with their real father. But then again, Michael's a bold guy. [pause] Is bold the right word?

Jim

Michael: Hey! I would like a nice slice of Christmas Pam. Side of candy Pams. And perhaps some Pam chops. With mint...
Pam: Can I help you, Michael?

Dwight: He was already dead, and we Schrutes use every part of the goose. The meat has a delicious smoky rich flavor. Plus, you can use the molten goose grease and save it in the refrigerator, thus saving you a trip to the store for a can of expensive goose grease.
Jim: Wow. Win-win.

Jim: Where did you learn all of this?
Prison Mike: Internet.
Jim: So, not prison.
Prison Mike: And prison. Fifty-fifty... both. Look, prison stinks is what I'm saying.

Pam-alam-a-ding-dong. Listen, you're cute. There's no getting around it. So, I don't know if you like country music, but I was thinking that maybe one of these days we could drive out to a field, crank up some tunes, smoke a few Macanudos, maybe even toss around a disc around. Utway ooday ooyay inkthay, Ampay?

Andy

What was the worst part about prison? The dementors. They flew around and sucked out your soul. and it hurt.

Michael

Close your eyes. Picture a convict. What's he wearing? Nothing special. Baseball cap on backwards. Baggy pants. He says something ordinary, like 'Yo, that's shizzle.' Okay, now slowly open your eyes again. Who were you picturing? A black man? Wrong. That was a white woman. Surprised? Well, shame on you.

Michael

Michael: You, my friend, would be da belle of da ball. Don't drop da soap. Don't drop da soap.
Ryan: Michael, please.

Kinda sounds like prison is better than Dunder Mifflin.

Pam
Displaying quotes 217 - 228 of 364 in total

The Office Season 3 Quotes

Pam: I actually might not go. Feeling kind of tired.
Meredith: Do you wanna make appletinis and watch Sex and the City at my place?
Pam: Oh, I don't know. I haven't decided. Yet.

Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho, and you told her that she was the only ho for you. And that she was better than all the other hoes in the world. And then suddenly... she's not yo' ho no mo'.

Michael
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