Hi it's so nice to meet you! I'm Grace and you must be fat.

Grace

Must be going around gay-care, I mean day-care.

Ricky

Amy: I hate myself when I don't trust you. You're the best husband in the world.
Ricky: I'm not your husband.
Amy: Yeah we have to do something about that.

C'mon you disease carrying skank, you know I love you.

Grant [to Grace]

It's funny how one little argument can destroy the entire universe.

George

You cannot date your sister's... IMPREGNATOR!!!

George

Sometimes I just look at him and can't believe he looks back at me the same way.

Amy [about Ricky]

He's driving around half asleep with Jesus as his copilot.

Nora

Sometimes doing the right thing doesn't always make a person happy Ben.

Amy

If Amy Juergens doesn't marry me, it's gonna take a lifetime to get over it. And I'll just be satisfied being the best dad I can be.

Ricky

It's not like I have anything to do because college is so much easier than high school.

Ricky [sarcastically]

What are you doing in my personal space?

Ricky [to Adrian]