The Sopranos Season 1 Quotes
Carm, you're not just in my life. You are my life.
Tony
Dr. Melfi: When's the last time you had a prostate exam?
Tony: Hey, I don't even let anyone wag their finger in my face.
Livia: I'm happy for ya Junior. I know how long you waited ta be made boss. Just don't let certain people take advantage of your good nature like they did to Johnny.
Junior: What certain people? Nobody got over on Johnny. Nobody's gonna get over on me.
(to Carmela) Divorce is for the weak-for people who never intended on dying married in the first place.
Father Phil
(to Tony) I feel like I'm someone you've chosen to procreate with.
Carmela
This psychiatry shit, apparently what you're feelin' is not what you're feelin' and what you're not feelin' is your real agenda.
Tony
(to Junior) Remember the story you told me about the father bull talking to the son. They're up on this hill and looking down on a bunch of cows. And the son goes to the father, "Dad, why don't we run down there and fuck one of these cows?" Now do you remember what the father said? Father says, "Son, why don't we walk down there and fuck them all?"
Tony
Junior: I always thought you could make the pros. You could have done it. You had a swing like Joe D.
Tony: You're crazy.
Junior: What? You think I'm fucking you?
Tony: Yeah, I could barely hit .250.
Junior: That's because you didn't want it. Too busy chasing skirt. Chasing skirt, your average was .500.
Dr. Melfi: What's the one thing every woman - your mother, your wife, your daughter - have in common?
Tony: They all break my balls. No, I know what you mean. They're all Italian. So what?
Dr. Melfi: So maybe by coming clean with me you're dialoguing with them.
(to Christopher) You chose this life. You don't wanna work in the rain, try out for the fuckin' Yankees.
Tony
(to Carmela) What did you guys do for twelve hours; play Name That Pope?
Tony
(to Meadow) What do you study in India? How not to get diarrhea?
Tony
