Therapist: Tell me about these size pills you're giving Mac.
Dennis: Well, now that's more like it. So, they're Mexican ephedra. Calling them 'size pills' was an elegant solution. The guy was gross, it was disgusting. He was fat as shit, he smelled like shit, he sounded like shit, his groans, his snores, his sleep apnea, it was gross. He was repulsive really.
Therapist: So, you've been drugging him secretly?
Dennis: Giving a man medicine for his disease. Wherever did I get that idea?
Therapist: What are you writing?
Dennis: What? No, not writing. Drawing. Drawing conclusions. Drawing this...
(Dennis holds up his drawing of himself holding the naked Therapist's grossly exaggerated and oversized breasts from behind) You like this? It's very generous.


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It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Season 8 Episode 5 Quotes

Frank: I opened up to a therapist just once. I was a kid. I got into a fight. The doctor asked me question after question, got me so scrambled up. Next thing I know, I was shanghai'd upstate to a nitwit school. You know what a nitwit school is?
Therapist: I assume you mean a school for the mentally disabled.
Frank (spits pistachio shell): Yeah, not just for nuts in the head, but bodies, too. Back then science was real crude, they stuck us all together. My roommate was a frog-kid. You ever see a frog-kid?

Mac: I gained and lost 60 pounds in 3 months.
Therapist: That's almost impossible.
Mac: Well, through God all things are possible, so jot that down.