American Idol

Recap

Mary J. Blige was the excited guest judge on this audition edition of American Idol.

We won't bore you with a rundown of the awful contestants, but will instead focus on the aspiring singers that received a golden ticket to Hollywood. On with their names and details!

Keia Johnson: 26-year old from Memphis. We wished she hadn't sung “My Heart Goes On," but Blige loved it. Winnder of Miss Congeniality in a beauty pageant, Simon says he has to see more to become convinced... but that means she gets a ticket!

Jermaine Sellers: 26-year old from Jolliet, IL. Referred to as the "real deal" by Randy, which seems like high praise. But his backstory includes a mother with spina bifida and he's got a great, hude gospel voice.

Mallorie Haley: 20-year old from Winner, SD. She sang “Piece of My Heart” by Janis Joplin. We enjoed the rock tinged country voice. It was an interesting combination that went well with her confidence, as Kara pointed out.

Bryan Walker: 25-year old from Sevierville, TN. He sang “Superstar” by Leon Russell and the panel was simply shocked that an ugly person could be a good singer. Didn't they watch Susan Boyle? Off to Hollywood!

We guess we have to mention "General Larry Platt," too. He's a 62-year old that sang something called "Pants on the Ground." It made the judges laugh, but made us groan. Can we please move on to the part where just talented singers take the stage? That's why we watch!