The Tuesday A.M. Gossip Girl Plus-Minus Index

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Te Gossip Girl +/- index from New York Magazine is never to be missed the morning after the show. With a unique, New York-based take on the episode, this Tuesday column tradition has developed into a must-read, never ceasing to amuse, inform and more.

Some highlights from their take on "The Empire Strikes Jack" ...

  • Of course Rufus, like the complete idiot he is, would think it was a great idea that his son is dating his best and only friend. Plus 1.
  • Okay, wait, why is Eleanor already offering Jenny a "permanent position" with Waldorf Designs? She's still in high school! Minus 3.
  • DOROTA! PREGNANT! Plus 10!
Ed and Laura Harring
  • Elizabeth wouldn’t exile Chuck from the hotel immediately. That’s just sloppy. And Jack wouldn’t rush it, either ... no public humiliation? Minus 5.
  • We love how when they’re in the van der Woodsen-Bass apartment, they have expensive Belgian-style waffles as opposed to frozen ones. Plus 2.
  • Those guys were too sober to take in a teenage girl who was so obviously drunk. Nobody wants to get barfed on that early in the night. Minus 3.
  • Plus 10 for correctly indicating that the main way economic downturns affect the rich (Eleanor) is by providing them the opportunity to get richer.
  • Please, Eleanor Waldorf would invent a new name for her designs for teens. Everyone does that! It’d be like, E-dubs or W-2 ... or BLAIR. Minus 5.
  • Serena's idea that Vanessa set up "a date night inspired by his favorite film" is the worst idea in the world. No teenage or post-teenage dude would be into that, unless the film in question is Deep Inside Jenna, and we assume Serena would know that. So did she tell Vanessa that in order to sabotage her? If so, Plus 4 for this subtle reveal of Serena's diabolical, evil Alpha Girl personality, which we haven't seen in ages.

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Gossip Girl Quotes

Even Blair Waldorf can not bend DNA to her will.

Dan

Hazel: Do you know what you're doing, Little J?
Jenny: I'm not Little J anymore.