Will the real Lucifer please stand up?
In Lucifer Season 5 Episode 3, our true Prince of Darkness finally returns to Los Angeles.
Amenadiel heads down south to let Lucifer know what Michael has been up to lately, and he has to go back topside to fix things.
Lucifer: So, you’re telling me that my dickhead twin showed up on Earth, assumed my identity, and then wreaked all sorts of havoc on my life?
Amenadiel: That about covers it, yes.
Not only has Michael threatened Charlie, but apparently he is now the only one with a direct line to God. Although God does not talk back to him. Very cryptic.
What does it mean that Michael is at God's right hand? Is Amenadiel insinuating Michael is manipulating the almighty himself? This seems to be a bigger problem they are likely to return to later in the season.
Heeding the warnings, Lucifer returns to LA and goes straight to the police station.
He is not immediately met with open arms, though.
Chloe reasonably tells him to turn around and leave, thinking he was Michael. She soon realizes this is her Lucifer and she's overcome with relief.
That, too, is short-lived.
Lucifer says Michael is a liar, but there is one thing he cannot discreit. Michael dropped the bomb on Chloe that she was born for Lucifer, a legitimate gift from God himself. She was desperately hoping this, too, was a lie. Lucifer, though, takes this opportunity to tell her the truth.
This is a lot to process, of course, and Chloe is upset at Lucifer for keeping this from her. But, really, is that fair?
Lucifer: But Detective, you’re the only reason I’m here.
Chloe: Apparently, you’re the only reason I’m here.
Lucifer never lied to her about who he was, and it took her the longest to believe any of it. When she did find out the truth about him, she plotted with a priest to destroy him. So naturally, it would be expected that she couldn't handle everything at once.
She wants some space from Lucifer, until they find out their next victim is a TV showrunner that Lucifer helped get his start. He created a show, Diablo, inspired by Lucifer's crime-fighting life.
Meta episodes of TV are always ten times funnier, and this is no different.
Diablo is a self-centered devil who thinks quite highly of himself, and his partner, Detective Dancer, is a former stripper turned detective, who also happens to be considered the "fun police."
Chloe is not amused, but we are.
Diablo and Detective Dancer even take it upon themselves to try and investigate Matt's murder, showing up at Matt's writing motel room the same time Chloe and Lucifer are searching it.
This turned out to be a bad idea on Diablo's end. His investigation resulted in his own murder. An unlikely duo was able to solve it, too.
Dan was still concerned for Lucifer and his obvious negative vibrations. Lucifer being Lucifer, of course mocks Dan for his newfound interest in crystals, positive vibes, and an all-soy diet. The interest and kindness Michael showed Dan seems to be long gone.
Is it bullshit? I don’t know.... I don’t care. ‘Cause losing Charlotte made me realize we have so little control over our lives. I was so pissed about it for so long, but this… it keeps my mind positive, and it helps me.Dan
Dan, though, seems to get to the root of what's bothering Lucifer. He knows he's feeling vulnerable about something (given all the negative vibrations he's putting out of course). Lucifer finally gives in and accepts Dan's positivity bracelet (I'm calling it a friendship bracelet, personally).
Dan and Lucifer getting along and running lines together is adorable. It's the friendship we didn't really know we needed.
Ironically, they are the two (along with Ella) who realize Diablo found out Dancer was the killer all along. Who could've expected these two to end up working together?
Lucifer restarted another partnership, in his therapy with Dr. Linda.
He gives her a rundown of everything that has been going on with Michael, Chloe, and Amenadiel. She, of course, is a little concerned about Amenadiel.
Linda: So, you left Amenadiel in hell?
Lucifer: Really, doctor? An evil twin, the detective finding out she’s a gift from God, and that’s the part you’re stuck on.
Linda: Amenadiel. The father of my child.
Amenadiel watching over hell is not a concern for Lucifer whatsoever. He is, as usual, more concerned with Chloe and the damage Michael has wreaked on his life.
Like every other time, she has to help Lucifer get out of his self-centered thinking. Chloe just got a major bomb dropped on her life. The woman is allowed a little time to be angry and shocked.
Linda counsels Maze, too, later while watching an episode of Diablo.
Linda: Maze, you know I’m not going anywhere, right?
Maze: Maybe not on purpose, but you’re gonna drop dead in what? Five years?
Linda: How old do you think I am?
Maze has resigned herself to the fact that people will always leave her, whether they want to or not. She finally breaks down, crying over Lucifer, Chloe, and Eve. They've all left her in some way or another.
This is the therapy session Maze has needed for awhile, to get over some of the anger she feels.
Linda, too, seems to have something in her past she needs to address. Perhaps to do with that cryptic photo she was crying over in Lucifer Season 5 Episode 2? Is this what she's concerned about going to hell over?
It's hard to believe Linda has done something bad enough to get an eternity in hell, but as Lucifer has said time and again, that's not exactly how it works. A human's guilt is what condemns them to hell. It seems Linda has plenty of that.
Lucifer has guilt over a number of things, too. But it seems he hasn't always been fully responsible for those things.
Michael comes back to the penthouse, determined to continue to cause Lucifer some trouble.
We've learned Michael plays on people's fears and can manipulate them. It turns out, he's manipulated Lucifer, too, and in no small way.
Michael admits to having planted the idea of the rebellion in Lucifer's head in the first place. He doesn't stop there, either.
Michael: Maybe it wasn’t just the rebellion that was my suggestion. What else? What about your little sexcapade in the garden, or… oh, your vacation here to Earth.
Lucifer: That’s impossible.
The garden and Eve. Leaving hell for Earth. Michael planted those ideas in Lucifer's head. And none of these came with small consequences, either. Why? All because Lucifer thought he was better than Michael.
Amenadiel and Maze were right all along. Michael simply is, and always has been, jealous of Lucifer, and he has gone to great lengths to ensure Lucifer's downfall.
Can we trust what Michael says, though? We know he has no qualms about lying to get his way. We also know he plays on one's fears. Is it possible he is just doing this again? Lucifer has always feared being manipulated by God. Michael could just be playing on this fear, making Lucifer think he indeed has been manipulated since the literal beginning of time.
Michael isn't done, though, causing problems in Lucifer's life. His next stop is Maze, who he tells Lucifer has been keeping a secret from her. What secret could this possibly be? Could it have anything to do with her abandonment fear? Does she have parents?
Michael is a piece of work and clearly is not done wreaking havoc on Lucifer's life.
Lucifer tries to go to Chloe and commiserate over also being manipulated, but she's not hearing it.
Lucifer: I get it, Detective. You’re struggling with feeling like you can’t cope. Well, welcome to the bloody club!
Chloe: You have no right to yell at me. Our situations are nothing alike. You are an angel. You deal with celestial craziness all the time. I am just a person, Lucifer.
Lucifer thinks they can relate. They've both been manipulated by cosmic beings. Chloe, though, is not convinced.
It's different for her. She finally deals with being in love with the devil. Now she finds out she was created for him? It's a bit much for a human to process.
People in romance novels and movies say they were "made for each other" all the time, and it's a cute romantic notion to them. Thinking it and knowing it are two different things, though. Does it mean you actually had no free will? No say in the matter?
Lucifer should understand where Chloe is coming from, though. He felt the exact same way when he found out, and even went to the extent of marrying someone else so Chloe would not want him anymore.
He worried Chloe's feelings for him weren't real and now she has those same worries. He eventually got over it, and she likely will, too.
Hopefully it won't take her as long, though.
Over to you, Fanatics!
What are your thoughts about Chloe's reaction? What do you think Lucifer is hiding from Maze?
Sound off in the comments and share your thoughts!
Berea Orange is a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.