Abed Quotes
We'll definitely be back next year. If not, it'll be because an asteroid has destroyed all human civilization. And that's canon.
We're like Goonies, except our story tracks logically.
Imaginary Britta is right--and ONLY Imaginary Britta.
Abed/ Fourth Wall
Annie: That's why Abed is like a brother to me. You guys are so alike.
Abed: I can't accept that based on one time machine story.
You're like ice cream cake out there--overkill.
You're not the Marco Polo of bullying me. You're just another tourist taking pictures of a great big wall.
Abed: If you were a post-apocalyptic survivor--
Professor Hickey: I would raise goats, hoard cinnamon, and only travel at night. But please--I have some work to do here.
I'm going to crash the premiere of the Kickpuncher reboot dressed as classic Kickpuncher. They shouldn't have redesigned that costume. Keep your heads in the sand if you want.
If I had a final wish, I'd use it to stay alive.
Troy and Abed: Troy and Abed are in mourning!
Jeff: Will you guys please stop doing that?
Annie: I can't believe you did it during your eulogy. SO UNCOMFORTABLE.
Abed: I don't think the audience got that we were singing "mourning" with a "u."
Troy: You were singing :"mourning" with a "u"? Oh no!
Abed: There's a two day course called "Nicolas Cage: Good or Bad?" I'm signing up--I've always wanted to know.
I thought the meaning of people was somewhere in here. Then I looked inside Nicolas Cage and I found a secret--people are random and pointless.
