Andy Bernard Quotes
Michael: Ok, Dwight grab your stuff, we're going to New York to party with Ryan and to meet girls.
Dwight: Yeah!
Andy: Oh yes! Count me in dudes. I am in some serious need of some bro' time. Old ball and chain's been a lot more chain than ball lately if you know what I'm saying.
Angela: I'm right here.
You meet a lot of ladies driving an Xterra, because you pull up to a stoplight, and look over and there's an Xterra next to you. They're always driven by chicks, so there's your icebreaker.
People assume I'm great at golf. But like everybody, I hated golf lessons when I was a kid. So, I used to hang out at the sailing club instead. Got my "knot" on.
Hit about 1,200 balls last night, in preparation for today, so hands are a little tender. It's actually not funny at all. It's incredibly painful.
Andy: Tuna! I'm engaged!
Jim: I know. That's awesome, man. That's great.
Andy: Mr. Andrew Bernard... got a nice ring to it.
I've been carrying that ring around in my wallet for six years. Because you don't know when you're gonna meet the right girl and the moment's gonna be right. And tonight, with the fireworks, and the music, and everything... it was right.
Andy: Angela, will you do me the honor of giving me your tiny hand in marriage?
Angela: ... Okay.
Andy: Into the mic, sweetie.
Angela: I said, okay.
Andy: She said yes! And the crowd goes wild! Woo!
I did this for the little guy. For Joe six-pack. The guy who wakes up every morning in his $400-a-month apartment, wonders how hes going to pay his mortgage; wonders how he's going to fill his car up with oil; wonders how am I going to pay my kids' orphanage bills. That guy shouldn't have to wonder where he's going to park.
They say you should never mix business with pleasure. Really? Well then, explain to me how a putt-putt golf company operates.
Andy: I hear she's single and ready to mingle. I'm thinking about making a play for her. What do you think? Crazy, right?
Dwight: I think it's inappropriate to date someone you work with.
Andy: Isn't that part of the fun?
Dwight: No. I think you should date Kelly.
Andy: She works here too, how is that any different?
Dwight: Uh, she works in the annex. You're also welcome to date Toby.
Andy: What do you think of Angela?
Dwight: I think she's efficient.
Andy: No, not like that, as a woman. W-O-M-A-N.
Dwight: I hadn't noticed.
Andy: You hadn't noticed she's a woman?
Andy: Four! Three! Two! One!
Dwight: Yes!
Andy: Woo!
Dwight: Woo!
Andy: After numerous projections that the computer would crush all salesmen in it's path, I am very happy to report that our very own Dwight Schrute has crushed his electronic nemesis, if you will, by a whopping fifty-two reams.
Dwight: Reams. Wait. Say it. Say it again. Announce it again.
Andy: Fifty-two reams!
Dwight: No no no the first part.
Andy: Dwight has defeated the computer.
Dwight: Hey. So. What do you think? I did it for you.
Angela: I didn't ask you to do it for me.
Dwight: You didn't have to.
