Favorite April Ludgate Quotes
Andy: April, you're like an angel with no wings.
April: So like a person?
My mom's Puerto Rican. That's why I'm so lively and colorful.
April: I love you.
Andy: Dude, shut up! That is awesome sauce!
Jerry: I was walking Lord Sheldon.
April: Ew, is that code for some kind of weird sex act?
Jerry: Lord Sheldon is my dog. My wife named him.
April: Ew.
Andy recently diagnosed himself with what he calls Shoeshine Head. It's when you shine too many shoes and the fumes create a thunderstorm in your brain. Cures include coffee, cheeseburgers and napping on the floor.
Jean-Ralphio: This party sucks. Let's get out of here.
April: It's my birthday party.
Jean-Ralphio: It is?
April: Yes.
Jean-Ralphio: Sorry, boo.
April: I want to go to The Glitter Factory.
Leslie: Well, drop out of school and start doing meth.
Ron: Anyone find any mistakes?
April: Yeah, actually, in here it says that Pawnee is great, but in reality it's terrible.
Donna: You'll never guess what I found on Jerry's Facebook.
April: A friend? Buuurn.
April: So this is a multimedia project. First, a bunch of rats made out of garbage. And um, this is a TV screen that'll be like a big flat screen TV and it'll play looped video of knee surgeries. And then, this is a human-size hamster wheel that will be next to the mural, if we can get one. And it'll be spinning and there will be like a fat guy in it all the time like screaming and like eating raw beef and like bleeding and like blood will come out of his mouth and stuff. And um, it'll be like right next to, the mural.
Leslie: I have one question. Why?
April: If you have to ask, you don't get it.
God, why does everything we do have to be cloaked in like 15 layers of irony?
I don't care about that prize, but I'm gonna win because I want his happiness to away.
