Cosmo Kramer Quotes
Jerry: (singing along with the TV) The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. The wheels on the bus
(Kramer joins in with Jerry, only, he has a different version)
Kramer: The woman across the street has nothing on, nothing on, nothing on
Jerry: What's the matter?
George: My mother caught me.
Jerry: Caught you? Doing what?
George: You know. (All three give him blank stares) I was alone
Elaine: You mean..?!
George: (Nods) Uh-huh.
Kramer: (laughing) She caught you?
(Kramer sits in front of Jerry's window to see a naked lady)
Jerry: She's not there!
Kramer: Oh, I can wait
I'm out!!
I don't want a big flat noodle.
Joe: Are you still afraid of clowns?
Kramer: Uh-huh...
(Loud thump is heard from the door)
Jerry: Who is it?
Kramer: It's me!
Kramer: Why are you locking the door now?
George: We'll take it.
Kramer: No.
George: No, are you crazy?
Kramer: Let me handle this.
George: That's $500 that's a great deal.
Kramer: Man, you're blowing it, the guy's a pigeon.
George: This is not a Metallica concert, it's an opera. A little dignity, a little class.
(disdainful of public golf courses) It's crowded, the grass has big brown patches in it, they don't rake the sand traps. Not to mention the caliber of people you have to play with!
My Cubans!
(He runs off to the burning cabin)
These are Cubans. Maria, porquendo lociendo corendo congli!!
</i> Kramer
Kramer: Have we been intimate?
Elaine: Yeah, yeah we've been intimate.
Kramer: And how often do we do it?
Elaine: Kramer! How is that important? Honestly, do you really think he's going to ask you that?
Kramer: Elaine, he's a psychiatrist. They're interested in stuff like that.
Elaine: All right, all right. We do it, uh five times a week. Okay?
Kramer: Ooooh baby!