Sense Billy says most students don't pay 150,000 dollars over 20 years to get their black belt.

Nothing to be alarmed about, it's just a man pointing a bull tranquilizer as a coworker.

Angela: I bet she'll eat them right out of your hand with those big strong teeth.
Dwight: Did I tell you about her teeth?

Dwight: Long term tractor releases can put pressure on a relationship.
Clark: Yeah, a lot of my buddies are going through the same thing right now.

Nostalgia is truly one of the great human weaknesses...second only to the neck.

People underestimate the power of nostalgia. If baseball can use it to get people to care about that worthless sport, then I can use it to get my siblings to care about the farm.

He used to talk about planting a peanut/grape hybrid...one plant, one sandwich.

You had black hair and then grey hair.

You're back...and you're disgusting.

I really like Andy these days. He's pretend and he does exactly what I tell him to.

I have to say, I like hanging out with a vengeful bitch.

We can tell him his mother is dying. That usually works on him.

The Office Quotes

Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.

Michael

When I was in college I used to get wicked hammered. My nickname was Puke. I would chug a fifth of SoCo, sneak into a frat party, polish off a few people's empties, some brewskies, some Jell-O shots, do some body shots off myself, pass out, wake up the next morning, puke, rally, more SoCo, head to class. Probably would have gotten expelled if I had let it affect my grades, but I aced all my courses. They called me Ace. It was totally awesome. Got straight Bs. They called me Buzz.

Andy