Favorite George Sr. Quotes
Lucille: Buster's been humping the widow Austero.
Buster: Mom ...
George, Sr.: Is that true?
Buster: No. We're taking it slow.
Lucille: He stays there sometimes until 7:00, 8:00 at night. Peanut brittle on his breath. Is she the one who's going to take him to the dentist?
Buster: She already has.
George Sr.: You're pimping out your sister?
Michael: Well you were pimping out my mother!
George Michael: It's the girl who ripped my heart out. The girl whose face will always be etched in my mind.
George Sr.: Her?
George Michael: She's really funny.
George Sr.: Well let's hope so.
Lindsay: I mean, it's always been "Michael's got the brains, Gob's got the charm, Buster's got the ..."
George Sr.: High-fastening pants.
Lindsay: You said that?
George Sr.: No, I'm saying that now.
George Sr.: Hi ... This is not what it looks like ...
Lucille: It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence.
George Sr.: Yep ... Yeah, that's it.
George Sr.: Don't get involved. Believe me, when I thought your first wife was driving us apart, I did not make a stink.
Michael: You complained all the time, and she was my only wife. And she died.
George Sr.: Yeah, well. See, things have a way of working themselves out.
Michael: You mean you taught me a lesson not to teach lessons?
George Sr.: It was my last lesson.
Gentlemen, we do not wave our genitals at one another to make a point!
(George Sr. & Lucille are in different cars. They almost crash).
George Sr.: Up yours, granny!
Lucille: You couldn't handle it!
Lucille: You smell like a pine cone.
George Sr.: (disguised as Oscar) Yeah, that's the weed. I went to my, uh, *BEEP*hole trailer and, uh, I smoked some... Like a cigarette.
George Sr.: I never see you anymore, Michael.
Michael: You're in prison. And I was here yesterday.
George Sr. : Oh, yeah, that's... That's... I'm sorry. I couldn't break away from the poker game. Capital-G was down to his boxers.
Michael: Strip poker?
George Sr.: Yeah, and it's tough. We can really only play about... Two hands.
Gob: So what, you're gonna cover her eyes, take her out to the limo...?
George Sr.: No, we're going to knock her out with this ether, stuff her in this garment bag and carry her out to the car, if anyone see's you do the same. Oh, hi Tobias.
Mrs. Featherbottom: (singing) Whenever I get a wee bit scared I hum a little tune, humdidididi...doo.
