Infeld: I hired you boys to shake up the zombie culture but I think you've over-corrected.
Jared: You can't over-correct zombie culture.

I've got to figure out how to be on TV naked more often.

You think everyone's head looks tiny because you've got a huge head. You look like a Mardi Gras float.

Damien: You're bait for a scumbag like Leonard Franklin.
Jared: Hey that's my crappy dad you're trashing.

I'm like a ladybug, but tough.

It makes you an intern and I need someone to sexually harass and get me coffee on the double.

As long as we are on this road together, we'll be alright.

Did you come here to dance on our graves because you're early?

You are the Hugh Hefner of wackos.

Is this why you went to law school? To bring down fellow lawyers?

Saying that Sixteen Candles is a better John Hughes movie than The Breakfast Club? Objectively wrong.

We fight. We don't run.

Franklin & Bash Quotes

See that's a talent, sounding like a total asshole even when you're supposedly saying something sincere.


"Sorry, sorry. Jean Claude Van Damme marathon last night. Unavoidable.