Favorite Kenny Powers Quotes
Terrence: You want a smoothie?
Kenny: No, I'm straight.
Why would you do this to me? Here this whole time I thought you were the whore with a heart of gold. Instead you're just a whore with a real whore's heart.
(To his hired date) I said put something nice on. You look like a busted Daytona stripper in that.
I don't know what's going on, man. I'm just all jammed up inside. Lost my abilities. Been stripped of all of my god-given talents. Including the talents to be able to have sex with any woman I choose, or throw a f*cking ball fast, or to not prematurely come in my pants. Sometimes I just don't even know which one hurts the most. I'm ashamed of myself.
Sometimes you gotta wash away the paint, and reveal to the world the jackass that is hiding beneath.
I mean, no offense, but you got a sh*tty job, you're not quite as tall as me, nobody really respects you. You have me on the other hand. I got the glory, I got the fame, the money, the jewels, the cash, the Denali. Getting drunk on the reg, f*cking good times on the reg, yachts on the reg, sex on the reg... Basically all the sh*t that most guys fantasize about.
No, I was using an alias. Steve to me, just kinda seems like the name of somebody who has absolutely nothing going on in their life.
A lot of people ask me, 'Kenny Powers, you're a giant superstar. You can get any woman. Have you ever paid for sex?' And the answer is yes, I have. Several times, in fact. And it's actually kinda cool. You can negotiate practically anything and sometimes, even just kind of do stuff in the moment that you never agreed to pay for and it goes by without much argument.
Sure, I've been called a xenophobe, but the truth is, I'm not. I honestly just feel that America is the best country and the other countries aren't as good. That used to be called patriotism.
I play real sports, not try to be the best at exercising.
I'm Kenny Powers! And I am very upset with how I am acting right now. I just have a very hard time expressing my emotions, and I can't stop from yelling.
Kenny: Who the fuck are you?
Pat: I'm your dad. No, I'm just kidding, your dad's dead.
