Favorite Kenny Powers Quotes
You know, Stevie, when I first met you, I'll be honest with you, you were a little bitch.... But now I'm looking at you, and to me you seem like a dude who knows what's up. You don't take sh*t from anybody, you smoke weed on the reg. Quite frankly, you're somebody I'm proud to know. And you're somebody who deserves whole hell of alot more than just being an assistant.
Just like Neil Armstrong, I went to space, and now I'm back and nobody gives a shit.
Kenny Powers' days of burnin' ass are done. And that's not a homosexual reference.
I'm laying down my new audiobook. No writing, just spoken words - the old fashioned way.
I just want you to know that I've been thinking alot, about, you know, what happened at the cookout. It's just that we were there, and then we were touching each other, and I saw those t*ts and I started feeling your ass and I started breathing heavy and almost got a headache. Then my vision started to go all colorful. Then I just came in my pants. But I won't do that again.
From this moment forward Kenny Powers is just like everyone else. Normal. Not special. No hopes. No dreams. Pretending to be happy when he's really super sad. Just an average guy with exceptional hair. Nothing more, and nothing less.
You wanna fight do it on your own time, in a parking lot somewhere, not in a school surrounded by books.
Kenny
Stupid cookout. As if their f*cking cookout is any sort of big thing. You should see my f*cking cookouts, man. When I was back in Seattle, I had the goddamn Spoonman from the Soundgarden videos coming to my sh*t. I'm talking 6 grills burning at all times. Tiki torches, 3 whole pigs, sh*tloads of macaroni and cheeses, baked potatoes, collard greens, a horse, f*cking Puerto Rican chicks showing their pussies and tits off everywhere. They were amazing.
I am talking about me. I want — these are questions about me personally as a superstar. You know, you got this moment in time here with an American icon and you're gonna waste it asking a question about the f*cking mile?
I was your savior. I was your knight in shining armor. In each of you, were the chinks upon my armor. Each of you were the chinks. You all were the chinks! Remember me, my chinks...
There's one thing I have learned through all my adventures and conquests - it's that some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great - I just am great.
I am not trying to sound cocky or full of myself, but Kenny Powers has a sneaking suspicion that no matter what comes his way he will always be great. Because that's just the way sh*t works sometimes.
