Favorite Kenny Powers Quotes
If you've got something you want to say, then just say it. You can save us alot of time with this f*ckin pointless history lesson in this goddamn creepy, uninmpressive, f*ckin hall. I don't like it in here. It's gross.
Do I have all the attentions of everyone? Attentions please. For those of y'all who do not know who I am, my name is Kenny Powers. And as f*cked up and weird as it may seem, I used to be a teacher here. But now I return to you. A victor, a champion, a man who has defeated the face of Mexican baseball... not to... get back my old job... f*ck that noise.
The good thing about getting over depression is... well... you can start to see your enemies more clearly. Suddenly, everyone isn't an obstacle, just some people are... And it might be someone that you find is in your bloodline, distant and as brown as their skin can be, they still are part of you.
I learned alot down in Mexico. I learned that sometimes to be the man, you gotta beat the man. I learned the grass is not always greener. I learned that adversity's sweet milk. That's philosophy, April.
Well, I wouldn't want to ruin a sale, huh? Guess you guys got to make those commissions to be able to buy all the goddamn... the FUBU, and the Oshkosh B'gosh, and the sh*t the baby's gonna be wearing. Hey, potential home buyers. Hope ya'll know there were alotta rapes that happened in this house
Yeah, I've actually had multiple orgasms on jet skis. Maybe it's something in our blood that we can just ya know, get hard from riding f*ckin badass ya know, terrain vehicles... water crafts...
I paid cash for the motherf*cker. Bought it with an advance that I was paid for this, uh... self help novel I'm about to have published onto the Oprah's book clubs... Pretty much saved all my pennies from my major league days. Invested a lot of it very wisely in stocks, bonds, famous works of arts.
Chapter 17. Done, and f*ckin' done. Just like that, the journey is over... depression is finished, and you're on your way back to the world of the living, smiling, regular people... The road has been paved with d*ckheads, backstabbers, and pains in the f*ckin' ass... but memories were made, allies were had, pole smokers were toppled, and the truth was discovered.
We can do some f*cking great things tonight, you guys. Follow me. Walk with me out on to that field. And when you do, you will f*cking put your ass out, and you raise your f*cking head up. Know that you'll never, ever... ever reach the heights that you're gonna reach tonight. But you can leave here knowing that you helped Kenny Powers' dreams come tru... For a bunch of Mexican baseball players, that ain't too bad.
Kenny: I need you to score me some juice.
Clegg: What do you mean? Like from the store.
Kenny: No, you idiot. Steroids!
So, besides getting shot in the back of the head do you know what else Abraham Lincoln did? He was a champion wrestler in high school and no, I'm not making that up.
Kenny: What are you looking at?
Paper Boy: Your hair asshole.
Kenny: Yeah, nice job making three bucks a week dipshit. Sell weed and you'll make more money.
