Pam: I think we should get a townhouse in SoHo.
Ryan: SoHo's mostly lofts but okay.

Not to point out the glaringly obvious, but doesn't the fact that I'm in this group make anyone feel just a little bit better?

Little advice. Take a day off from the whole Jim schtick. Try caring about something. You might like how it feels, James.

How do I know that Robert is gay? He liked my facebook photos at three o'clock in the morning.

Kelly: No, he's just a big fraud Deangelo. He's like Rango. He doesn't work here basically, just like the way Rango didn't save those animals. It was just a big misunderstanding.
Deangelo: Is this true Ryan?
Ryan: I did not see Rango.

Michael: Ryan, how are you today?
Ryan: Why don't you ask my therapist? My mom certainly pays her enough.

Pam: Their breadsticks are like crack.
Ryan: I love when people say "like crack" who've obviously never done crack.

Ryan: Will you marry me, Holly?
Holly: No.
Michael: Only one that I was kinda worried about.

Blogs are out but people are texting each other "no more animals."

Dwight: You got this Kosher certified?
Ryan: No I meant it like, it's cool, it's Kosher, it's all good.

Ryan: This isn't the U.S. government.
Kelly: What are you referencing?
Ryan: Everything... everything.

Ryan: You should enter it in festivals.
Kevin: Or carnivals.

The Office Quotes

Dwight: What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.

Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me... No, don't sue me. That is the opposite of the point that I'm trying to make.

Michael