Favorite Tracy Jordan Quotes
Tracy: Who else is going to be at that party?
Jack: Well, you're going to be sharing the stage with NAS...
Tracy: Nope, he hates me! We used to date the same girl.
Jack: What about Young Jeezy?
Tracy: Forget about it. I called his pit bull gay on 106th and Park.
Liz: That would do it.
Why don't you come back home to TGS and pick the peas out of my fried rice... and the rice. I just want carrots.
I know it's a girl, Liz Lemon, because I yelled out 'Susan B. Anthony' at the moment of conception.
Jack: Look, Tracy, I can't just give you money. But what I can do is show you how you can earn all the money you need. You must know Arsenio.
Tracy: Hall or Billingham?
Jack: You know someone named Arsenio Billingham?
Tracy: No.
Do a sloppy job and they'll leave you alone. That's how I got out of foreplay with Angie ... and my taxes.
Liz: I'm not firing Josh.
Tracy: You always take his side.
[cut to flashback]
Liz: Tracy, stop tasering him!
[cut to present]
Tracy: See? I need to be respected, Liz Lemon.
Tracy: Well, I'm embarrassed to say I've missed the birth of both of my sons... for very legitimate reasons.
Dot Com: Cooking a French bread pizza and forgot.
Jenna: I'm the hot blonde...
Tracy: And I'm the nerd who takes off his glasses and everyone realizes he's handsome.
Frank: Yo Tray, we got a problem.
Tracy: [as Jefferson] Pray who be this Tracy Jordan thou speakest of?
Frank: Uh, President Jefferson, we got a problem.
Tracy: Speakest!
Frank: That horse ate your wig.
Tracy: Well, stand guard by his rump and await it in his droppings!
Lutz: Or we could probably just go get a new wig?
Tracy: A-ha! I like you, young man; you shall run my university.
Tracy: I want to hold a mirror up to society and then win world record for biggest mirror.
Frank: He's totally right.
What is Senor Mexico saying? Stop keeping me out the loop!
I took my son to his cello recital this morning at what turned out to be midnight yesterday!
