Favorite Tracy Jordan Quotes
Tracy: Well, I'm embarrassed to say I've missed the birth of both of my sons... for very legitimate reasons.
Dot Com: Cooking a French bread pizza and forgot.
My addiction to prescription glasses! The fact that I suffer from attention deficit disor- Jack, your shoes are shiny!
Jenna: We decided we'd get them all hot soup.
Tracy: So... go do that.
Kenneth: Oh, all the other pages have gone home sick, I can't make any runs right now. Maybe the two of you could go get the soup.
[long pause]
Jenna: I don't understand.
I know it's a girl, Liz Lemon, because I yelled out 'Susan B. Anthony' at the moment of conception.
Do a sloppy job and they'll leave you alone. That's how I got out of foreplay with Angie ... and my taxes.
I'm afraid she'll divorce me if I ever have enough money where she can live off half.
Who cares? She's awesome and so am I. I want Serena Williams to be my mother!
That's a great goal for a crazy person.
I cursed for three hours straight just to get it out of my system.
Tracy: No, Dad! Don't die! I love you Dad! I don't wanna dogfight no more!
Jack (normal voice): Tracy that's it! That's it!
Tracy (to therapist): Thank you for showing me there really is love in my family after all. And I need to stay the hell away from them. Donaghy, you're the only family I need, Jackie D.
Jack: You got that right, Tre. You know it's too bad you didn't know Howard Cossell when you were growing up because I had that one in my pocket the whole time.
... then I need you to be back by noon to make the bathroom smell like sandalwood before I wreck it.
Why don't you come back home to TGS and pick the peas out of my fried rice... and the rice. I just want carrots.
