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I love you too, Willis.

Beard: Coach, is this nuts? Us leaving like this?

Ted: I mean, we almost won the whole frigging thing, you know? Saying goodbye to a bunch of nice folks. And I know I’ve finally accepted that air conditioning is a privilege and not a right. I don’t know. What do you think?

Beard: I can’t do this. I don’t wanna go, Ted. I’m in love with Jane. I wanna stay, and I don’t wanna let you down. But with your permission, I’d love to run off this plane and into her arms.

Ted: Well, I mean, what about your luggage?

Beard: Forget my luggage. It’s full of rice.

Ted: What? Why?

Beard: I haven’t slept for three days, man.

Ted: Okay.

Beard: I’m sorry, you know. I’ve been dreading this. Talking to you. Abandoning you.

Ted: What?

Beard: No, no, no, hold on, Coach.

Ted: You ain’t abandoning me, okay? You’re just following your heart. I get it. And, yeah, you should go. But look, man, I don’t think they’re gonna let you off this plane with that door already shut.

Beard: I have a plan.

Ted: Of course you do. Okay. What do you need me to do?

Beard: Whatever’s about to happen, that’s a great start. I love you, Ted.

Ted: I love you too, Willis.