It's all right, Agent Simmons, I won't bleed out. The synthetic blood is mostly for appearances' sake.

Aida

Director Mace: In case you haven't noticed, Phil, we're not a team that trusts. We're not a team at all.
Coulson: You may be right. But we better become one if we're going to stop Eli Morrow from blowing up half of Los Angeles.

That's the most ridiculous idea I've heard all day, and I've had a long day.

Mack

Eli: I can create a city out of nothing. I can cover it in volcanic rock. Robbie, I am becoming a god.
Robbie: You better be. Because the devil is coming for you.

Okay, forget about the fact that I was mildly attracted to her. That totally goes against the Sekovia Accords. Doesn't anyone remember Ultron?

Director Mace [on Aida]

Mack: It's not a mask, it's a balaclava.
Robbie: I thought that was a dessert

Coulson: When this is over, it's time. We're cracking that bottle.
May: You won't have to twist my arm.
Coulson: I wouldn't dare. You'd whip my ass.

I don't like magic. Or clowns. Clowns with knives and magic. In the dark.

Fitz

Give me my vengeance on Eli. Settle my score, and I'll settle yours. All of yours.

Robbie [to Ghost Rider]

I ran an illegal spy agency using powered operatives on American soil. Do you think the President loves that about me?

Coulson [to Fitz]

May: What's your name?
Nathanson: Nathanson, ma'am. What can I do?
May: Get lost, Nathanson.

I've got to phone her. Let her know I'm in another dimension...that's not going to work.

Fitz