Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXPopular Archer Quotes
After he literally stabbed me. In the back!
Slater: Just Slater, it's a mononym like...
Malory: Jesus Christ!
Slater: Nope
Crash: I'm your guide, Crash McCarren. Um, I thought there were three of you.
Archer: One of us is weeping in the car.
Cheryl: What the stupid shit are you doing??
Cyril: You said you wanted watermelon.
Cheryl: Watermelon's red?
Cyril: Yes. How do you not know that?
Cheryl: Who am I? Charles Frederick Andress?
Lana: So how did you get the name Crash?
Crash: Oh it's a long story about me saving the lives of 8 other climbers right after an avalance
Lana and Ray (in unison): Sploosh
Crash: We head out at dawn
Archer: And that's AM?
Crash: As opposed to...?
Archer: PM Dawn?
Lana: [to Archer] So will your feelings be super hurt if I bang him?
Ray: [from off-screen] Yes!!
What, Lana? Look at all the shit I had to pack. I don't know what I'm gonna be wearing for apres-montees. And Ray forgot the gum!
Pam: I don't want a show up with a black eye.
Archer: Not a real diverse crowd?
Pam: Eye, idiot! Eye! Although no, not a lot of black guys in rural Wisconsin, and I don't want to sound racist but...
Archer: Power through it
Barry: Said the dumbwaiter. Get it Archer? As in you're dumb and you dress like a waiter?
Pam: Told ya!
Archer: Goddamnit Pam! This is exactly what a man should wear to a (wedding)
Look, I know you're bitter cause you people can't get married or whatever but All You Can Eat Prime Ribs!
Edie
Krieger: That's what they said about Tesla's deathray! So this favor. Lana...wait Lana, what's this favor?!
Lana: (as she's running away) Just promise to use your powers for good.
Krieger: Hahahah, no
