Favorite Arrested Development Quotes
Chairman: They're balls?
Pilot #1: We're looking at balls. Let's turn it around.
Pilot #2: Copy on the balls.
Gob: I will not take this sacred duty lightly. I am going to get you the single healthiest call girl that this town has ever seen.
Michael: This is why I'm calling it a witness and not a best man. All you gotta do is watch.
Gob: I'm not going to spend this kind of money and not watch!
Lucille: Oh, it's probably all in a storage unit somewhere.
Michael: Where's the storage unit?
Lucille: I don't remember.
Michael: Try.
Lucille: Something-dale. I don't know -- Brookfeather, Raintree. It's hot. It was very hot there. I've never been ... get a warrant.
Michael: Don't think I won't.
Tobias: No, I can't... I have an audition tomorrow. I'm up for a minor, but meaty role in a feature film: Confidence Man 2.
Gob: Oh yeah? I didn't see the first Confidence Man.
Tobias: No... 'Confidence Man 2' is my character.
That's what you do when life hands you a chance to be with someone special. You just grab that brownish area by its points, and you don't let go no matter what your mom says.
Buster
Gob: Oh, Nagama, you've got a moustache.
Michael: Hey.
Gob: I mean, you've got milk on your moustache. I mean, you've got a milk moustache.
Gob: Michael, you can save this family. Please, do the right thing here. String this blind girl along so that Dad doesn't have to pay his debt to society.
Barry: The solution to all our problems is staring you right in the face, and it can't even see you.
Tobias: As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch.
Michael: Really? When did that start?
Tobias: Well, I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help.
Buster: It's like she gets off by being withholding.
Gob: Look who's got something to say.
Buster: I'm Mom and I want to shoot down everything you say so I can feel good about myself. 'Cause I'm an uptight -- BLEEP -- Buster -- You old horny slut!
Michael: Well, no one's gonna top that.
You're a good guy, mon frre. That means "brother" in French. I don't know why I know that. I took four years of Spanish!
Gob
Michael: Excuse me. I'm looking for an Hermano.
Soap Actor #1: (in Spanish, subtitled) My brother? Right there.
Michael: Right there, in the green? Great. Thanks. Gracias. Hermano. Are you Hermano?
Soap Actor #2: (in Spanish, subtitled) My brother? Right there.
Michael: That's the guy who just ...
Soap Actor #2: Mm-hmm.
Michael: Son of a bitch.
(Regarding Buster) Maybe it was the eleven months he spent in the womb. The doctor said there were claw marks on the walls of her uterus. But he was her 'miracle baby'. And I-I was just too burnt out on raising you guys to care. So... He turned out a little soft, you know...
George Sr.
