Lindsay: Yeah. So did I. And now I hear you're telling our mother that I'm completely irresponsible and a stay-in-bed mom?
Michael: That doesn't even sound like me. That sounds like Mom. Or Bruce Vilanch. Could be Bruce Vilanch.

Lindsay: No, Michael, I don't just sleep all day.
Narrator: Actually, Lindsay was so upset at Michael that she tried meditating to calm herself but ended up taking a two-hour angry nap.

Michael: Yeah, it's Michael Bluth for Barry.
Barry: (whispering) I'm not here.
James Alan Spangler: Uh, Barry's not here. Can I give her a message?
Michael: Yeah. Tell her she needs to whisper a little softer next time. And I'm not paying for this phone call.
Barry: I am not a girl, you ...
James Alan Spangler: Go on. Call me something. I'm redoing my kitchen.

Look, I don't want to go through a whole song and dance with you. You're going to love it. You just can't do anything that violates the original painting, like giggling or itching. They do allow some nervous crying, but you can tell they don't like it.

Buster

Gob: Well, if it isn't the boy who lives under the stairs.
Michael: Hey, Gob.

Marta: Te quiero.
Gob: English, please.
Marta: I love you.
Gob: Great. Now I'm late.

Lindsay: Fine. I'll ask Michael. He'll give it to me.
Lucille: Well, maybe if you get him drunk. It's the only way he'll give money to someone who calls his "stay-in-bed-mom..."
Lindsay: He said that about me?
Lucille: I know it was harsh, but, you know, he thinks you're completely irresponsible. A stay-in-bed mom. Probably because you don't work, and you're lazy. Oh ... his words.

Lucille: Lupe, there are some juice glasses on the sofa table.
Lindsay: Oh, Mama, I'll help you clean up. (to Lupe) There are some salad plates on the piano.

Lindsay: Maeby, where have you been?
Maeby: You left me at home. You do remember you have a daughter, right?
Tobias: Uh, yes. Uh, of course we remember, and we were worried sick, young lady. She's fine. Our daughter is all right.

Narrator: Wayne Jarvis had become famous after an employment discrimination suit against the family's current attorney, Barry Zuckerkorn.
James Alan Spangler: It'll be a long time before Barry Zuckerkorn calls anyone a "homo" again.

Lucille: Barry's very good.
Lindsay: He's an idiot.

Tobias: I would be happy to play Adam. Uh, I'd prefer a speaking part.
Lindsay: Please don't speak for the rest of the meeting.
Tobias: Zing!

Arrested Development Season 1 Episode 7 Quotes

George, Sr.: Thank you. Thank you for coming down on Christmas Eve.
Barry: Oh, it's like any other day, except that I bill double.

Lindsay: How'd it go?
Michael: Well, the bad news is you're in debt again, and we never busted Mom, and we're stuck with Barry.
Lindsay: Mm.
Michael: The good news is we've been asked never to participate in the pageant again.