Arrested Development Quotes
Gob: I will not take this sacred duty lightly. I am going to get you the single healthiest call girl that this town has ever seen.
Michael: This is why I'm calling it a witness and not a best man. All you gotta do is watch.
Gob: I'm not going to spend this kind of money and not watch!
Michael: It does seem like you've been having a lot of trouble since the hair transplants. Maybe you should see a buboman.
Tobias: A ... buboman?
Michael: A doctor. It's a British expression, like they say "go up box" instead of "elevator".
Tobias: Oh, yes. Like when they say "poofter" to mean "tourist".
Michael: You guys got these jackets on inside out?
Rita: Yeah, that way you see the label.
Lindsay: I mean, that's what you're paying for, right? It's a great statement on fashion.
Rita: Is that a magic trick? I love magic.
Gob: I don't appreciate the dry British humor.
(about Rita) She was "special," but she wasn't smart.
Narrator
Trevor: It's not your fault your parents were cousins, but here we are. I've been charged with taking care of you, and I'm bloody well going to do it.
Rita: Well, Michael will be my cousin soon enough, 'cause we're getting married!
George/Larry: Larry, go to a mirror. You're fired.
Larry: What?
George/Larry: It's over.
Larry: And this is how you tell me? In the middle of a wedding?!
George/Larry: You shouldn't have said anything.
Larry: You shouldn't have said anything!
Trevor: I've got a problem with you having sexual relations with that man.
Narrator: So do I.
George Sr.: Just because a woman gets pregnant doesn't mean you have to marry her. Too many lives have been ruined because some cheap waitress at a HoJo said she used an IUD.
Lucille It was a Stucky's.
George Sr.: But I believed you.
(After Rita has walked on the water)
Michael: Hang on a sec. That's part of your trick, right?
Gob: No, that's not my trick, Michael.
Narrator: On the next Arrested Development ...
Gob: It's my illusion.
Michael: You've never told me how many houses there are in the British Parliament.
Rita: Seven.
Michael: Are there?
Narrator: The answer is three.
Michael: Does sound about right.
Narrator: Three is the correct answer.
Lucille: Where's your hand?
Buster: I'm having my high school ring put on it. And my hook is stuck in the stair car.
