Popular Californication Quotes
So overall you would recommend the experience of sleeping with your teacher?
Becca
Charlie: She's a cocktail waitress with a screenplay. Ok.. an idea for a screen play, but still, I see potential and I just -
Marcy: Oh please! You see blow job!
That's the thing about secrets, Hank, they have a funny way of coming out.
Mia
Becca: We used protection! He had a condom in his wallet that he said had been there since high school. It wasn't love and it wasn't perfect or anything but I'm glad I did it, I got it over with. And i wanted to tell you first, because I wanted you to know that you didn't fuck me up. My life is tough and weird and unpleasant sometimes but I walk around knowing that I have parents who love me and care about me and who always try their best even if they screw up sometimes. I know I gave you a hard time when mom was gone, but I hope you know that I love you, Dad, and I always will.
Hank: Alright... um, can you wait till New York to tell your mom about this?
I ended up sexiled with the nerd, the Michael Cera type.
Becca
(To Charlie) Whether you know it or not, you're a maverick, a renegade, you beat off to the march of your own drummer.
Sue
Hank: Barney Greengrass, where you may have very well been conceived, young lady.
Becca: Really?
Hank: Yeah.
Karen: Actually, no, it was the bathroom at CBGB's.
Becca: Jesus Christ, boundaries, people!
Hank: Yeah, well we went to the bathroom at Greengrass the next day, if you recall, and who's to say which batch of seed took root, woman!
Becca: And there goes my appetite!
Hank: We should maybe go pay a visit there, to that shrine to your vagine.
Hank: What's that look?
Charlie: What look?
Hank: That shifty somewhat cunty look of yours.
Remember how fast my masturbation video spread? That was unnerving.
Charlie
Abby: Is there something I should know here?
Charlie: Such as?
Abby: Is he retarded?
Start with a shower, you smell like you just walked out of a fisting contest.
Abby
I love women. I have all their albums.
Hank Moody