Henry David Thoreau Diet Squirt.

Abed [on his porn name]

They're making us walk around with pretzels in our butts, and I put mustard on mine like an idiot.

Troy

My uncle was struck by lightning. You'd think it would give you superpowers, but now he just masturbates in movie theaters.

Troy

Annie: When you found out I was Jewish, you invited me to a 'pool party' that turned out to be a Baptism.
Shirley: Well excuse me for trying to sneak you into Heaven.

Abed: He still assumes I'm a terrorist.
Pierce: If you're not, I'm sorry. If you are, I'm a hero. I'm willing to take that chance.

Britta: So what's the context for constantly calling me as a lesbian?
Pierce: If the wallet chain fits... I'm just trying to help you find yourself.

I got a B on my nutrition final, and I am celebrating with pie and a dollop of whipped irony.

Jeff

Community Season 1 Episode 21 Quotes

Britta: So what's the context for constantly calling me as a lesbian?
Pierce: If the wallet chain fits... I'm just trying to help you find yourself.

I got a B on my nutrition final, and I am celebrating with pie and a dollop of whipped irony.

Jeff