Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSCougar Town Season 4 Quotes
Don't bum out Jules, not everyone is blessed with our God given lack of judgment.
Laurie
So all shoplifters are magicians?
Jules
I don't know what you're thinking, but it's like watching a gay porn with just one dude in it.
Ellie
Grocery store jail, seriously?
Laurie
If you don't want to be someone's bitch, you gotta get ripped.
Jules
Get crabbin' bitch.
Jules
This episode is funnier if you know that Courteney is terrified of birds.
Title Card
Jules: When did you get so good at lying?
Ellie: There's no shortcut. Just practice, practice, practice.
Jules: Time for family dinner.
Grayson: Uh, if it's family, then why is she here?
Ellie: What am I supposed to do eat with Andy? I did that yesterday.
Laurie: If you really want to get back at a man, scare him with a pregnancy test. I've got a whole box of old positives at my house.
Ellie: You're an American treasure.
Travis: You know, I've actually been experimenting at school.
Ellie: I totally called that!
Jules: What's his name? Is he cute?
Travis: I meant with religion.
Jules: Aw man, I was excited to show you how cool I'd be about it.
You're dressing like a lady who would do stuff for just a little bit of crack.
Laurie