Your kid's got a walk in closet?! Two of mine gotta sleep in the car!

Cleveland

• Permalink: Your kid's got a walk in closet?! Two of mine gotta sleep in the car!
• Added: February 15, 2015

Just last week I let you watch me complain after I ate too many hot wings.

Peter

• Permalink: Just last week I let you watch me complain after I ate too many hot wings.
• Added: February 15, 2015

There's nothing here, besides a weird life-sized doll made out of all the stuff that was stolen.

Peter

• Permalink: There's nothing here, besides a weird life-sized doll made out of all the stuff that was...
• Added: February 15, 2015

One day a rain will come and wash all the scum off the streets.

Joe

• Permalink: One day a rain will come and wash all the scum off the streets.
• Added: February 15, 2015

You go home and tell your mother, she's supposed to be a parent, not a friend.

Peter

• Permalink: You go home and tell your mother, she's supposed to be a parent, not a friend.
• Added: February 15, 2015

Aw, Quagmire got away with it and learned nothing -- that's great.

Peter

• Permalink: Aw, Quagmire got away with it and learned nothing -- that's great.
• Added: February 08, 2015

You got a good body man, why do you hide it under your robe?

Peter

• Permalink: You got a good body man, why do you hide it under your robe?
• Added: February 08, 2015

Did you hear about your ex-husband yet? He's had a procedure.

Stewie

• Permalink: Did you hear about your ex-husband yet? He's had a procedure.
• Added: February 08, 2015

Quagmire: Where do you get off?!
Stewie: Pretty much everywhere I hear. Fat man's right -- they're making this easy.

• Permalink: Pretty much everywhere I hear. Fat man's right -- they're making this easy.
• Added: February 08, 2015

Don't think of it as 20 years -- think of it as two 10 year olds, you sick freak.

Peter

• Permalink: Don't think of it as 20 years -- think of it as two 10 year olds, you sick freak.
• Added: February 08, 2015

You know I'm carrying three handguns and the metal detectors picked up nothing?

Peter

• Permalink: You know I'm carrying three handguns and the metal detectors picked up nothing?
• Added: February 08, 2015

My misguided carnal instincts are the results of being raised by a sexual deviant.

Quagmire

• Permalink: My misguided carnal instincts are the results of being raised by a sexual deviant.
• Added: February 08, 2015