Fresh Off the Boat
Fridays 8:30 PM on ABCFresh Off the Boat Quotes
Have fun. Everything waist-down is your territory. I made that very clear in our vows.
Jessica
Little Evan is finally talking to Big Evan.
Eddie
Are you starting high school or prison?
Jessica
Eddie: Oh hey, maybe your stepdaughter Nicole would like to join?
Honey: Sure. I'll ask Marvin and then he'll ask her and she'll tell him what the answer is. It's the way we communicate at dinner. (sighs) Takes a long time to get the salt.
Jessica: And we have been invited to the chamber of commerce charity fundraising event. It's in a country club!
Louis: Why are you so excited about a country club?
Jessica: Because of Caddyshack. It's my favorite movie set in a country club. I've always wanted to go to one. "Spaulding get your foot off the boat!" It's so much yelling. It's so good.
Mitch: One blooming onion.
Louis: Uh, Mitch, I think you meant to say one booming onion. Blooming onion is the intellectual property of one less good restaurant.
Eddie: I'll cut ya! Headbutt ya! (rapping)
Emery: Mom! Eddie's rapping at my always-there bear.
Eddie: Did they give you that pin for narcing?
Louis: You're not taking Mitch.
Mitch: They doubled my salary.
Louis and Jessica: OK, goodbye Mitch.
Louis: I guess this isn't the country club night you were expecting.
Jessica: Are you kidding? We stuck it to a rich guy. It's just like Caddy Shack.
Louis: You better watch out because Scarface and Miller's Crossing are coming at you.
Restaurant Owner: Is that what you guys call each other? There's nothing I hate more than a couple of cinephiles.
Which one says I'm rich enough to be invited but not rich enough that you can ask me to donate money?
Jessica
Eddie: What's this?
Louis: 50 small to buy your video game
Eddie: Why?
Louis: Because you don't have to be a hard man to be a hard worker
