Futurama Season 1 Episode 8: "A Big Piece of Garbage" Quotes
Farnsworth: I'm a dried up husk of a scientist. This is all my fault.
Fry: No, it's my fault too. I'm sure I threw out more than my share of that trash up there. Also, one month my toilet broke and it just went straight in the garbage can.
In lighter news, the city of New New York is doomed. Blame rests with known human Professor Hubert Farnsworth and his tiny, inferior brain.
Morbo
Leela: Hey, watch it! You'll put somebody's eye out!
Bender: OK, OK, keep your space pants on.
Leela: (getting the bomb ready) Get ready to run. We've got 25 minutes... Uh, 15 minutes... 10 minutes... 5 minutes... "6-H" minutes?
(Bender picks up the bomb and turns it upside-down.)
Bender: Here's your problem: the professor put the counter on upside-down!
Leela: That idiot! It wasn't set to go off for 25 minutes; it was programmed to go off for 52 seconds!
Fry: (screams) WE'RE GONNA DIE!!! Right?
Bender: Right.
(Fry screams again.)
Farnsworth: Now here's the bomb I've prepared. Once you activate it, you'll have 25 minutes to get away.
Leela: That's all? But-
Farnsworth: Now, now, there'll be plenty of time to discuss your objections when and if you return.
Farnsworth: Now, you'll only have one chance to destroy the ball. After that, it will be so close to Earth that blowing it up would cause garbage to rain over the entire planet, killing billions.
Bender: Oh, boo-hoo!
Linda: Next, New New York in crisis. Morbo?
Morbo: Thanks, human female. Puny Earthlings were shocked today to learn that a ball of garbage will destroy their pathetic city of New New York.
Linda: Makes me glad we live here in Los Angeles.
Morbo: Morbo agrees!
Poopenmeyer: My God! The senile old man is right.
Wernstrom: Do you mean him or me?
That smell could be anything; a faulty stench coil, some cheese on the lens, who knows?
Wernstrom
So that's the situation. Due to the short-sightedness of Old New York, New New York is going to be destroyed by a giant ball of garbage.
Farnsworth
(After watching an online movie on the solution to the garbage problem in New York)
Fry: Wow. You got that off the internet? In my day, the internet was only used to download pornography.
Farnsworth: Actually, that's still true.
(In the movie)
Female Scientist / Porn Star: Now that the garbage is in space, Doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions?
Male Scientist / Porn Star: With gusto.
Farnsworth: My God! Whatever it is, it's headed straight for us. With enough force to reduce this entire city to a stinky crater. We have less than 72 hours.
Bender: Well, let's get looting!
