Lorelai: Hey, I got your note.
Rory: Yeah, well, putting it in the mallomars was a pretty safe bet.

Rory: Why aren't you saying anything?
Dean: Words seem to be very dangerous right now.

(to Rory) Be sure to gloat a little, it's good for your skin.

Lorelai

(about a boy) What happened? I thought we really connected in that supply closet.

Louise

Lorelai: Luke, I need fifteen thousand dollars which I can't find, don't have, and if I don't find, the house is gonna fall down.
Luke: I can help you with that.
Lorelai: You can?
Luke: Yeah, I can get a couple guys, we can get in there and do the work.
Lorelai: You can fix this?
Luke: Well, I can help. I know a good contractor. He did some work on the diner.
Lorelai: What about the money?
Luke: Um, you won't have to deal with that right away.
Lorelai: I won't?
Luke: No, you can pay it out in installments if you want. Monthly, bimonthly, whatever - whatever you're comfortable with.
Lorelai: So, let me get this straight. Uh, you and some guys who actually know what they're doing are gonna come over and fix my house, and I can pay them back whenever I want?
Luke: That's right.
Lorelai: 'Cause I'm Tony Soprano?
Luke: Only scarier.
Lorelai: Now Luke, when I finally do make out this installment check, uh, who should I make it out to?
Luke: Well, you can make it out to me if you like.
Lorelai: Oh, so basically you would be fronting me the money?
Luke: Well, yeah, but it's no big deal.
Lorelai: Luke, that's a loan.
Luke: No, it's just a temporary exchange of money for services that will be paid back when you finally have the... it's a loan.
Lorelai: Man, you suck as a liar. Thank you.
Luke: You're welcome.
Lorelai: I can't take it.
Luke: I know, but it was worth a shot.

Rory: Maybe I didn't study hard enough. Maybe I got cocky.
Lorelai: Maybe you need a major mud bath/salt glow/chill pill combo.

Lorelai: You are not seriously sitting there.
Emily: No, it's a hologram. Lifelike, isn't it?

Emily: If you didn't work so hard you wouldn't have a tension headache.
Lorelai: It's not a work tension headache, mom.
Emily: So, then you are sick.
Lorelai: Actually, I am. I'm sick.
Emily: I knew it. What's wrong?
Lorelai: Consumption with a touch of the vapors. I'm going for a leeching tonight after coffee.
Rory: She's got a case of exterminatoritis.
Emily: What's that mean?
Lorelai: Nothing.
Rory: We have termites.
Emily: Oh, that's terrible.
Lorelai: It's not so bad.
Rory: They're eating our whole house.
Lorelai: But they always say thank you.

Rory: You're being stubborn.
Lorelai: Oh no! Have I shocked you?

Kirk: (about the cost of exterminating the termites) Well, I haven't done the exact estimate, but I'd say somewhere in the neighborhood of fifteen thousand dollars.
Lorelai: (laughs) Tell it to move to another neighborhood.
Kirk: I'm sorry?
Lorelai: Fifteen thousand dollars?
Rory: We're never eating again.

Welcome to the first and probably-never-again-because-Sookie's-on-the-verge-of-a-nervous-breakdown Bracebridge Dinner!

Lorelai

(About inviting everyone to the Inn)
Lorelai: An out of control, over the top slumber party!
Sookie: I love it!
Rory: Me too!
Lorelai: Done! Spread the word.
Luke: I haven't said I'd come yet so I'm certainly not gonna suddenly become your messenger boy. (Lorelai gives him a glaring look) Eight o'clock?
Lorelai: Seven.
Luke: Right.

Gilmore Girls Season 2 Quotes

Emily: ...Rory finished in the top 3 percent!
Lorelai: I know.
Emily: You do? Well, who do you know at Chilton?
Lorelai: Um...Rory. (points at Rory)

Emily: So, what would everyone like to drink?
Lorelai: Uh, well, I'll have a white wine and Dean'll have a beer.
Dean: What?! (taken by surprise)
Lorelai: Corona, right?
Dean: (completely panicked) No, I don't want a beer! I don't drink beer. I'll have water or soda or anything. Or nothing. Not beer. Never beer. Beer is... beer's bad.
Emily: Relax Dean, that's just Lorelai's little sense of humor. (to Lorelai) You're very cruel.
Lorelai: Well, yes, keeps me young.
Dean: I'm just gonna sit here and stare at my hands.
Emily: Soda Dean?
Dean: Please.
Emily: Rory?
Rory: Oh, I'll have a beer. (Emily and Lorelai laugh) I'm sorry Dean, we're not laughing at you.
Lorelai: Oh wait, I think I was.
Emily: I think I was a little too. (Richard walks in) Oh Richard, there you are. Come join us.
Lorelai: Hey Dad.
Rory: Grandpa, hi. This is Dean. Dean, this is my Grandpa.
Dean: Hi. Sorry, uh, hi. (he gets ups and walks over to Richard)
Richard: Hello.
Dean: (offers to shake his hand) It's uh... it's nice to meet...
Richard: (ignores Dean's hand) Does everyone have drinks?
Lorelai: Uh yeah, we all have drinks. Thanks.
Dean: (he moves back to his seat and whispers to Lorelai) Should we do the beer thing again?
Lorelai: Uh, I don't think so.