Will: Well, thank you for the gift basket.
Abby: Oh, is that what the kids are calling it these days?

I think dick shopping is stretching the meaning of cultural attache.


Hey, sex with an ex can be fun. They know how to work the machinery, you know what I mean?


I made a huge mistake. I thought I wanted to be more like you, but I already am. You surround yourself with bullshit, and if I don't stop, I'm going to end up alone. Like you.


Phoebe: Anyway, I can't really talk about this because I have to talk about Moroccan pillows.
Abby: As one does.

Abby: Can I just say something?
Barbara: I feel like you're about to.
Abby: I wouldn't want to do this with anyone else but you.

Do not sign anything. I have a client. She is suing her gym. They will not let her out of her contract. Yes. I am fighting the fights that really matter.


Every since Ralf cut off the alimony, you're pulling away. It's like you blame me.


You goddamned bitch. You are going to be the next EL James!


Work itself out? Abby, your are dating the guy now, for reals. You have a right to know what is going on in his life.


Interviewer: So tell me, where do you see yourself in five years?
Barbara: That is a great question.

Mike: Don't do this, Abby. Don't spoil it.
Abby: It's great. It's rare. And that's why we should stop. Now.

Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce Quotes

Abby: Well, people know. I can tell. Eric Frank eye-banged me at drop off. He's like a divorce seeking missile.
Lyla: Yeah, well, he finger-banged Marjorie Davis so count yourself lucky.

Abby: You smell like sex.
Jake: Screw you.